Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Ask Dr. Geography: Affirmative Action

Dear Dr. Geography:

Why is it that so many people are complaining that children of wealthy parents may get an edge in college admissions in today's recession when for years affirmative action has favored the admission of unqualified minorities in the name of diversity?


Hampered in Hamilton

Dear Hampered:

Oh shucky darn. You got us there. Like you, I was deeply distressed when Harvard and Brandeis and Smith and Wesson and Lesley and Gore and Wellesley and Emerson and Palmer and Gordon and Lightfoot decided to let in only one White Puritan for every one hundred Wampanoag, Nipmuck, Massachusett and Narragansett.

As I recall, Samuel and John Adams had to claim to be the illegitimate cousins of Pometacom, Uncatena, Tispaquin and Weetamoo just to get their applications slipped under the door !!!

There has been a drought of Cabots, Lodges, Salstonstalls, Hatches and Ames admitted to Harvard compared to the effluvium magnum of Sousas, Soares, Gomes, Cardozas and Arrudas we have allowed entry to these hallowed halls in recent centuries.

Not to mention their slatternly, tattoo'd, multilingual daughters!

I blame the Chinese.

Press 1 for English !!!

Yours Inter Alia,

Dr. Geography

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